It all started a month before my due date when I was having strange pain and we went in to the L&D unit in Walnut Creek to be checked and the Doctor told me I could go into labor at any time… (That story is in the post before this one) That made for a really long last few weeks of pregnancy. I was going crazy, but trying so hard not to let it psych me out. I wanted to enjoy every last bit of one on one time with Madeline and it was hard. Let me tell you, Kaiser is not my favorite.
My due date was Thursday April 28 and of course, I went beyond that. Monday May 2, I had a check up with my doctor to see how things were going. We had set an induction date at my appointment the week before, for Friday May 6, so if everything was going well and the baby didn’t come on her own, I would have had her that day. (Side note: Nathan passionately did not want her to be induced on Cinco de Mayo because he thinks it’s the most ridiculous holiday) I went in for my appointment on Monday morning. My vitals looked great, the heartbeat was great, and then she looked at me and said, “You didn’t get much sleep last night, did you?” Nope. I didn’t sleep at all, and apparently I looked like it. Not exactly a compliment. I could also feel some sporadic contractions, but nothing that was painful. She decided to do an US to check the fluid and could see my stomach contract. She checked the fluid and said it was low and also decided I was in early labor (no sleep the night before and seeing the contractions), so she felt it was best not to wait until Friday to be induced, but let’s do it today. I said okay! I was ready to get this baby out.
I instantly let Nathan know so he could start heading back from the city. Then I sent texts to all the family and started organizing the care for Madeline. I got home and started packing things up. Megan came over to watch Madeline. I got really emotional as I said goodbye to Madeline. I had so many feelings and emotions going on at the moment… I was sad to say goodbye to my sweet Madeline for a couple days (we’ve never been away over night), what if something happened to me, she’s not going to be my one and only focus anymore, etc etc… I really wish we had gotten a picture of the three of us before we left.
Nathan and I checked in to the hospital about one in the afternoon. They had me get my lovely gown on and wait for a doctor to come in and check me out and make a game plan for induction. Well, we got to sit around for 3 hours. At 3:45 pm, a doctor came in to make a plan. She said I was dilated to 2.5 cm and she will start me on pitocin and see how things go from there. Before they started the pitocin, she said I should eat something because after they start it, I can’t eat. The nurse offered to bring me something from the kitchen and she came back with a turkey sandwich (um hello I’m pregnant. Listeria.) So Nathan headed out to grab me some Chick Fil A, grab himself some food at Whole Foods, and also pick up a new office chair that was a great deal at Office Max (are you surprised by this?). Well he was taking forever and I was getting frustrated and I was starving. I asked him how things were going and he said he was still waiting for the chair and hadn’t picked food up yet. WHAT?! I was so annoyed, I told him to leave the dumb chair and bring me food, we need to get things going and I am SO HUNGRY. He said the guys at Office Max were being dumb and super slow. He had the chair on hold and he could see it, but they wouldn’t let him take it without blah blah blah… So he left the chair there, and grabbed the food for me, and just got something from chick fil a for himself instead of whole foods. And then it took forever to drive back. He was gone about an hour and a half. I scarfed the food down and called the nurse in. At 5:30 pm they started me on the pitocin.
The contractions were getting a lot stronger pretty quick. I didn’t know that pitocin contractions are much worse than real contractions. I was in so much pain, and once I couldn’t handle it anymore, I asked for the epidural. The nurses said it was a super busy night, so the anesthesiologist would come in after she administered another one. (Something that was super annoying all night was feeling like everyone was too busy to really care and didn’t come in to check on you when they said they would)
The lady came in at 8:30 pm to give me an epidural and Nathan and I were both instantly annoyed. She was so bubbly and happy and overly complimentary, that it was so fake and obnoxious. Just too much. She tried to administer it two times and was unsuccessful. She kept telling me to bend over more and lower my shoulders more and I’m like, hello, this is as far as I can go with a giant baby in the way! And she kept saying that she kept hitting a bone spur, which is why she was having a hard time adminstering. I didn’t have that problem getting an epidural with Madeline… So on the THIRD try, she got it. Or so I thought. She said it was successful and made sure I was okay, then left. Then shortly after I started to feel SUPER nauseous and really dizzy. So the nurse gave me a bag in case I was going to throw up and then gave me something that would raise my BP and help the nausea.
I told the nurse that I was really numb on my left side and not at all on my right. And then I felt my tummy and my boob was feeling numb. I asked the nurse about that and she said “oh give it time, and just sit on your right side, gravity, etc…” Then I felt my shoulder was numb, and all of a sudden my chest got really tight, and I was having a hard time swallowing. I tried to clear my throat and I couldn’t use those muscles. I remember kind of saying, “I can’t breathe” and I started violently gasping for air. It was terrifying. I couldn’t breath. Nathan was there by my side not knowing what to do and panicking.
All the doctors and a midwife came in and were surrounding my bed. I was gasping for air and they gave me some oxygen, took off the pitocin, and stopped the epidural temporarily. After a few moments that seemed to last forever, I was able to take a breath, but then I was crying so that also made it really hard to breath. I remember in that moment I was thinking about Nathan, Madeline at home, and my unborn baby. I was terrified and so scared. I was finally breathing okay, but I was so emotional. The doctors were talking to me and asking me questions, but I couldn’t stop crying. I kept apologizing, which looking back was so dumb that I was apologizing for not being able to breath and for crying… Then the anesthesiologist came in to check on me. She just said some high pitched mothering words, but didn’t do anything.
They said my BP had dropped, but they didn’t know because the baby’s vitals were perfectly fine. Usually when a mother is in stress, so is the baby. They monitor yours and the baby’s vitals and can see them out on a monitor in the hallway so they can see if there is ever anything wrong. Turns out, the nurse had UNPLUGGED my BP cord, so it was only showing my last BP reading, and my BP quickly dropped (kind of like almost dying), but they had no idea because it wasn’t being taken like it was supposed to.
After my blood pressure and my breathing looked okay and I was settled, they placed the catheter and checked and I was ONLY 5 cm and 80%effaced. I’m like what?! After all that pain and everything I just went through, I’m only halfway?! Ugh. The midwife said she’ll check me in 2-3 hours.
At this point it’s about 9 pm and I’m finally settled and feeling okay. I was still shaken by what had just happened, but relieved everything was okay. The nurse told me to just sit on my right side to let gravity do it’s thing and help me get numb on that side. So I laid on my right side for 4 hours. And guess what, it didn’t do a thing.
Nathan was asleep on the couch and I was trying my best to relax. I could still slightly feel the contractions now and then on the right side, so it was not easy to sleep. Also, hospital beds are the worst. Around 12:30 am, a nurse came in to see how things were going and I told her I could still feel everything on the right side. At this point, I was having to breathe through the contractions because they were so painful. The nurse said, “Oh wow, yeah you really shouldn’t be breathing through those contractions…” I’m like YEAH HELLO?! I’ve been trying to tell you all night! But they didn’t care and didn’t know what to do about it. So it was more of the, well just sit on right side, gravity, blah blah blah. Then the nurse suggested giving a boost of the anesthesia and then wait 15 min and if it still wasn’t better, then do it again. So I did that. And the only thing it did was make my left leg completely dead.
At 1:00 am, the nurse said I was 7 cm and to let her know when I feel my water break.
1:30 am I felt my water break. The nurse came in and cleaned things up and said, oh hey, it’s about time to push! A midwife that we hadn’t met came in to deliver. She was really wonderful. The only wonderful person we encountered throughout our whole time there, and it was only for an hour. I started to push at 2:00 am. It was really not the experience I wanted since I could feel nearly everything. I was not prepared for that!! As I was pushing, I’m like, “THIS HURTS. SO. BAD!” and Nathan starts smiling and laughing, and I’m like, “WHY are you laughing?!” He said he was just laughing cause this was real and I was doing it and we were having a baby! The ring of fire was the absolute worst part. And after 20 minutes of pushing, Ellie Marie came into the world at 2:22 am on Tuesday May 3. The midwife lay her on my belly and saw that everything looked fine. She said she wanted to wait to cut the cord because she could still see such a strong pulse. I was okay with that, so she lay on my belly for a while and I marveled at another dark haired baby girl. Nathan got to cut the cord and said it kept slipping out of the scissors. It was a tearful, happy moment to see that baby girl was out safely and we were all doing okay.
